I am a creature of habit. I like routines, for things to stay the same (if they are good things). Anxiety is tricky and sometimes makes you think that if something is changing, it must be bad. But it doesn’t have to be.
At my current job, I don’t have co-workers. There is my boss and me. A lot of people have asked me if I get lonely or bored, and I find myself replying that I don’t. I remembered working at previous jobs and there being people I didn’t like. (I was a less-than-happy person with high anxiety. There was always something I didn’t like.)
There is now another doctor coming in to share our space. He is bringing an Office Manager/IT guy (?) and a receptionist. Suddenly, my space is not just my space anymore. I immediately wondered if the new girl would be nice. (I don’t even know if it’s a girl?!)
A few months ago, my boss thought of moving us to another office. I inwardly panicked, hating everything about the plan. It was further away from my house and I would be on someone else’s turf.
When my boss told me about this revised plan, I was surprisingly calm. I think it really came down to turf. I would have to reduce the space I use, the equipment I use and the schedule may be a little crazy, but at least it’s in my comfort zone.
I want to change my attitude so I don’t freak out so much about things changing. I think of summer, my favorite season, and the beach I love so much. Without change, we would never come around again to summer. Every autumn that creeps closer to winter, I dread the cold and snow. But it’s all for only a season before the flowers blossom and birds sing.
And before you know it, the waves are crashing on the shore and there is sand everywhere. If I didn’t have to endure the winters I hate, the summers wouldn’t feel so spectacular.
Because change is good…right?